saying yes, driving, and other observations

Yes means no and no means yes on opposite day. In India, yes looks like maybe and no means maybe until you say it three times. To say yes, instead of nodding, bring ear to shoulder and say in a disappointed-sounding voice 'okaay.' It's taken me some time to figure out that people aren't actually disappointed with whatever I've said.

To drive in India, you must have a good horn. Awoogah horns are the best, but any will do. Honk anytime you're turning, passing, parking, backing, changing lanes, speeding up or slowing down. Weave as much as possible, especially if it's on the wrong side of the road. Don't use headlights at night except if you want to accent the message you're conveying with the horn. If you want to hire a driver, choose one that describes himself with at least two of these words: in uniform, courteous, kind, friendly. Don't worry about getting a description of his driving capability. And if you rent a motorcycle, the best place for your helmet to ride appears to be resting on the handlebars.

I've found that while India is a very cheap place to travel, absolutely nothing is free or complementary. Every garden and museum costs at least a few rupees, and if you want to bring a camera, it's a few more.

Traveling alone started yesterday, and so far it's been fine. I've been pre-arranging as much as possible so I don't have to be mobbed by rickshaw drivers at every train station. People say that unmarried women traveling alone have problems keeping men away from them, but I've found that when asked 'are you married,' if I simply say NO and scowl, that seems to work well. Or a quick explanation that "american customs are very different from indian ones" staves off further advances. Traveling on the train alone presents a different problem. First class is the best, but then you're in a lockable compartment with a stranger. If that's the case, do you choose upper or lower bunk - easy escape or more privacy? It almost makes me inclined to travel a lower class simply for more people being around and less opportunity for anything unsavory to happen.

Eating safely isn't as hard as I thought it might be. Sure, I can't get a good spinach salad, but it's easy to peel most anything - and there are lots of baked, grilled, boiled and fried things that no bacteria could live on.

The cows are hilarious.